


Sinners will be sinners.

by itsarelyherec8



Category: American Horror Story: Asylum
Genre: Confession, Confusing, Escape, F/F, Fluff, Freedom, Innocent Mary, Love, Running Away, SO MUCH FLUFF, thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-15
Updated: 2019-04-15
Packaged: 2020-01-13 16:10:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18472423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsarelyherec8/pseuds/itsarelyherec8
Summary: After so many years of living in the asylum, Mary finally understood that everything in that place was wrong and evil, all thanks to one journalist who she had to thank for so many more things.





	Sinners will be sinners.

**Author's Note:**

> So, funny story about how this came up. I've been working with this story since last year and guess where I started writing this. Yep. A church. My parents wanted to go to church for so long that they convinced me though I said I would wait for them outside and I said I had hw so I took my computer with me and I started writing this story. Personally, I do believe in God and I have so many things to thank him for and I will always love him but, I consider that I don't belong to any religion. With that said, I hope you guys enjoy this story, it took me long to finish it but I'm happy with the result. Comment and leave kudos pleeease!

_“Forgive me God for I have sin…”_ Mary said closing her eyes and letting the tears roll down her face.

Mary Eunice McKee normally prayed three times a day but today, she prayed more than she has prayed her whole life. The reason? Lana Winters. Ever since the older woman was admitted to the asylum, Mary couldn’t seem to get her out of her mind. After all, it was her fault. She left her alone. She could have helped her get out but she couldn’t. Cause she left her.

Yeah, in part it was Lana’s fault too cause she was too eager to know the story of Kit Walker. But still, it was her fault. And now, she has to see her every day, suffering. It wasn’t her fault to be who she was. I mean, it was supposed to be a sin, right? Liking women. It was wrong. But it wasn’t her fault entirely. For a reason God made her that way.

 _“I don’t know what’s happening to me…”_ She whispered and sobbed, covering her face. This was wrong. Everything was wrong. Lana was confusing her. She was lost.

But she couldn’t stop thinking about her, she couldn’t help it. She wanted things that she never thought she would want in her life. She used to read a lot, she loved the fairytales she read, they weren’t real, but they were nice. A princess and a prince. Was that even real? Why couldn’t it be princess and princess? Or prince and prince? Why was it wrong?

Sister Jude always said it was a sin and God would never forgive people that were that way. And yet, she thought he would. The God she loved so much would forgive everyone, he loved everyone.

She sighed and dried her face with the blanket in front of her. This was wrong. She couldn’t be here anymore. She couldn’t let them hurt Lana again. She had to do something.

 _“I-I know you love me…I know you w-will forgive me. I know you love her. You will forgive us. I can’t let her suffer anymore, my Lord. She deserves better. I promise I will always be devoted to you but…I have to do what I feel is right. I-“_ She swallowed. _“I love her. I’m s-so sorry.”_

______________________________________

Lana woke up by the sound of her door opening. Ready to hear the nonsense of Sister Jude, she sat on her bed, surprised when she found it wasn’t Sister Jude but her favorite nun. Mary looked at her and placed her finger in her lips, indicating her not to talk. Lana nodded.

Mary walked to Lana’s bed and sat down beside her. _“I’m gonna get you out of here.”_ She whispered.

 _“What?”_ Lana shook her head, not believing what she was hearing.

Mary nodded and smiled softly. _“We are leaving. We’re running away from here.”_

 _“W-Why are you doing this?”_ Lana felt tears in her eyes.

_“You don’t deserve to be here. It was my fault in the first place and…now I know how bad is to stay here.”_

_“W-What about Sister Jude? Dr. Arden and-“_

_“They will notice. But that doesn’t matter, because by the time they notice, we’ll be far from here.”_

As hard as it was to believe it was finally happening, Lana trusted the young nun, she knew Mary would never lie to her.

Lana nodded. _“What do we have to do?”_

Mary smiled. _“Everyone is asleep right now. A car is waiting for us outside. But we have to leave now.”_

Lana thought about Kit and Grace for a moment, but she couldn’t wait for them. This was her way out and she was running away with Mary so no, she couldn’t wait anymore.

 _“What are we waiting for then?”_ Lana smiled.

___________________________________________

For a few seconds, Mary thought it was wrong what she was doing, she was breaking the law, she was disobeying Sister Jude, she was going against God. But as soon as she stepped out of the asylum with Lana holding her hand, she felt free. They were finally free and it felt right.

 _“I didn’t know you knew how to drive.”_ Lana looked at Mary.

Mary shrugged. _“There’s a lot of things you don’t know about me.”_ She looked at her for a moment.

Lana raised her brows. _“I was not expecting that.”_

Mary chuckled and blushed. _“Yeah well I um…I’ve always been shy but…I just keep everything inside me really.”_

Lana nodded. _“I get that.”_ She stared at Mary for a long time and smiled. _“Is it too far where we are going?”_

 _“Kinda. We still have 3 hours to go.”_ Mary nodded. _“I just…want to keep us far from that place so no one can really find us.”_

_“You have a place?”_

Mary nodded. _“It was my sister’s, but she’s now married and she moved away. I called her and she said I could stay there, it was mine now.”_

 _“You had everything planned, didn’t you?”_ Lana smirked.

Mary smiled and nodded. _“Yes, I’ve been planning this for 2 days now. I borrowed the car from a friend of my sister.”_

_“And Sister Jude doesn’t know anything?”_

Mary shook her head. _“No. I-…she would be against it. She would punish me.”_

_“She would punish both of us. Plus…she has a soft spot for you, she’d have forgiven you. Not me.”_

Mary sighed. _“That’s one of the reasons why I got you out of there.”_ She said quietly, keeping her eyes on the road.

Lana stared at her curiously, biting her lip. _“Are there more reasons?”_ The young nun only nodded. _“Can I know them?”_

Mary looked at her for a second and then back at the road. _“Soon.”_ She said softly. _“You should sleep now. I bet you are tired and like I said, there’s still 3 hours to go.”_

Lana nodded. _“Alright.”_ She laid her head on the seat. _“If you want me to drive, just tell me. I don’t want you to grow tired.”_

 _“I’ll be alright, Lana. Sleep now.”_ Mary smiled at her.

_____________________________________________

 _“Lana?”_ The young blonde touched Lana’s arm softly, trying to wake her up. She stopped for a moment and smiled, finding it so cute the way the older woman slept. She sighed. _“Lana, sweetie, we’re here.”_

Lana opened her eyes and stared at Mary, smiling at her. _“Oh, are we here already?”_ She asked sleepily.

Mary nodded. _“Yes, we’re here. Let’s go.”_ She got out of the car followed by Lana. She grabbed a bag from the back of the car and walked to their new house.

Lana gasped as she saw the house. _“T-This was your sister’s?”_

 _“Yes, it was. Beautiful, huh?”_ Mary smiled as she looked at Lana and then opened the door.

Lana walked into the house and smiled. _“Yeah.”_

 _“Well, we are staying here. This is ours now.”_ Mary smiled as she placed the bag on the couch and looked at Lana, eyes widening as she figured what she said. _“I-I mean…as long as you-“_

 _“I like the sound of that.”_ Lana smiled and bit her lip.

Mary smiled. _“M-My sister said she left some clothes she didn’t use anymore. You can go and check if you want to.”_

 _“Yeah, I could really use a bath. Thank you.”_ Lana smiled as she walked around the house.

Mary Eunice sighed and shook her head. _Would it be alright if I tell her the other reasons of why I got her out of the asylum?_ Maybe it wouldn’t be a big deal if she did so. Or what if she freaks out and wants to leave? Of course Mary doesn’t want to stop Lana if she ever wants to leave but…she wanted to at least spend some time with her before she leaves.

She grabbed the bag from the couch and walked to the principal bedroom, completely forgetting that Lana was in there. When she walked into the room, she saw the bathroom door open and got a whole view of Lana’s naked and freckled body. She froze as she roamed her whole body, she was perfect, her skin looked so soft and kissable. Mary shook her head and throw the bag to the bed, making her way out of the room. _Oh Lord, have mercy on me._

__________________________________________________

Mary distracted herself in a book she found. This was going to be her hobby from now on, these books were amazing. She heard footsteps and smiled as she saw Lana walking to the other couch that was in front of Mary.

_“I was waiting for you. I wanted to know if you wanted to order something, I bet you are hungry.”_

Lana smiled. _“Any suggestions?”_ She raised an eyebrow as she looked at Mary.

The nun blushed a little and cleared her throat. _“Well I…the pizza here is amazing. There’s this pizza place just a few minutes ago from here.”_

 _“Pizza is alright then.”_ She smiled and then tilted her head. _“I have so many questions right now.”_

Mary looked up to her and closed the book, placing it beside her. _“Ask away. I don’t mind at all.”_

Lana looked down at her hands, furrowing her brows and then back at the nun. _“What is the real reason of you getting me out of that place? Why would you ran away? I thought you loved that place. You were so close to Sister Jude and…Dr. Arden.”_

Mary looked down and sighed. She shook her head. _“I guess I changed my mind. Seeing everyone suffering…” **Seeing you suffering.** “…changed my mind. I’m still devoted to God, I love him, but…I just figured so many things that I knew I couldn’t be in there.” _She looked up at Lana. _“And you didn’t deserve to be there. Sister Jude put you in there and…it wasn’t fair. After all you went through…”_ she shook her head. _“We didn’t deserve to be there. I know the God I love wouldn’t have wanted that for us.”_ She said softly as she stood up.

Lana followed her with her eyes, still trying to understand what was going on cause she still felt like it was a dream. _“Did something else happened? I mean…to you?”_

Mary stood by the phone that was on the kitchen, closing her eyes to stop herself from staring at Lana. _“I’m still figuring out.”_

Lana nodded and sighed. _“You think God still loves me? He forgives me for my sins?”_ She said as she stood up to walk closer to Mary.

Mary opened her eyes to look at Lana, who was a few steps away from her. _“Of course. He forgives everyone. Whether you look up to him or not.”_

Lana smiled. _“You have a lot of faith on me. Though I don’t get why.”_

 _“It’s hard to understand really.”_ She smiled. _“At least for me to.”_

 _“We don’t really have to talk about it. I’ll just stick with that really.”_ She smiled softly. _“Why don’t you go take a shower while I call the pizza? I’m sure you’re also tired.”_

Mary nodded. _“Thank you. There’s money on the counter and the number is right here.”_ She pointed to a small book on the counter. She smiled as she made her way to the room. She sighed. _“She’ll find out sooner or later, Mary.”_

_________________________________

Mary sat on the couch hugging her legs as she looked out at the window. Her mind was lost in her thoughts as she tried to come to an agreement with them. She felt she was losing control and she had to make up her mind. She sighed and rested her chin on her knee.

She heard footsteps and turned around to find a sleepy Lana walking her direction.

 _“What are you doing up?”_ Lana asked softly as she stopped just in front of Mary.

Mary looked up at her and gave her a sweet smile. _“I just couldn’t sleep.”_

Lana nodded. _“Something in your mind is bugging you.”_ She sat down on the same couch Mary was.

Mary sighed. _“My mind is going nuts. I just can’t seem to stop thinking.”_

_“Anything I can help you with?”_

Mary put her legs down and looked down at the floor. _“I never felt this, you know? For anyone. When I became a nun, I knew I would never be able to have this feelings and then…”_ she huffed. _“…everything changed.”_ She shrugged. _“Like I said…I’m still devoted to God. But…the things I lived…the things I’ve seen…they made me change my mind.”_ She looked at Lana with tears. _“And now I’m letting my guard down and I…I’m feeling.”_

This was all confusing to Lana. Being a journalist always helped her to figure people out, to see when they were lying or nervous, to know in a way what they were thinking. But this young girl, this innocent nun was confusing her. She had a feeling of what could be wrong in her mind but she didn’t want to jump into conclusions just yet. She didn’t want to pressure the poor girl.

Lana licked her lips, placing one of her hands-on top of Mary’s, trying to comfort her. _“It’s understandable, you know? I know that religion and the outside world is really confusing and sometimes even the most devoted people can get confused about it. It’s okay that you feel that way. You didn’t know anything else but what they told you in there.”_

 _“But I did.”_ Mary looked down again and shook her head. _“I devoted my life to God because I couldn’t find myself, I just…everything was wrong for me. I was a joke to everyone cause I was innocent I didn’t know anything cause I was scared.”_ She sobbed. _“And then I got into religion and I thought I had found everything I was looking for but…I was wrong. I knew so little I knew nothing about me._ She looked up at Lana. _“And then you came along.”_ She smiled softly.

Lana’s eyes widened as she mentioned her. What she had to do with this whole confusion? She knew she was getting closer to the answer and she was somehow excited to know if her ideas were true.

 _“I met you and I…I knew you weren’t like any of those people. I knew you were good.”_ Mary continued. _“When I left you, I felt so bad cause I knew something was going to happen to you and the next thing I knew…Jude caught you.”_ Her smile disappeared. _“You were admitted there and I couldn’t do anything about it but play dumb again and I was scared she would be mad at me and I let her hurt you…when I knew you didn’t deserve any of that.”_

She bit her lip and shook her head. _“She thought she was doing right but she was not and I was so…pissed. And…I could never stop thinking about you.”_ She chuckled. _“You were always stuck in my head and I begged God to help me and then I knew the answer.”_ She shrugged. _“I let my guard down and I let you in and that’s when it all really hit me…who I was…what I was supposed to do…and I couldn’t stay there.”_ She looked up at Lana. _“Everything just made sense.”_ She felt tears rolling down her cheeks again. _“I’m so sorry. I didn’t want you to know this soon but I had to let it out.”_ She sobbed.

Lana’s heart broke as Mary stared at her again. She felt her own tears falling and her heart tightened. She took Mary’s face in her hands and smiled lightly. _“You have nothing to be sorry for, my love.”_ She chuckled. _“I’m just so sorry that you have to go through this but…now I’m here. And I will help you with all of this.”_ She leaned in and kissed her forehead. _“I’m here now and I am so sorry I am confusing you.”_

 _“No, y-you helped me, you know? In a way…now I know who I am and-“_ Mary stopped and her heart raised, her thoughts leaving her mind little by little. _“So…you’re not mad?”_

 _“Mad?”_ Lana looked at her again and shook her head. _“I’d never be mad, all the opposite…you don’t know how happy I am.”_ She smiled and caressed Mary’s hair. _“If I didn’t feel the same for you, trust me…I wouldn’t have stayed with you in the first place.”_ She giggled.

Mary smiled and chuckled. _“I’m still so lost with all of this but…only thing I know is that…I want all of this.”_

 _“I’ll accept whatever you have to give. We will take it step by step.”_ She looked into her eyes lovingly.

 _“I still don’t get how this can be a sin but…if that makes me a sinner, then I guess I’ll be a sinner.”_ The young girl smiled.

 _“Then sinners we’ll be.”_ She smiled and giggled.

Mary smiled. _“You know…”_ she bit her lip. _“…I wanna kiss you.”_

Lana raised her brows and chuckled. _“Oh…well…I can’t say no to that.”_ She smiled and leaned closer to Mary, waiting for her to be really sure about it.

Mary took a deep breath before closing the gap between them. Lana sighed against the nun’s lips and pulled her a little closer, simply pressing her lips against hers, not wanting to again, pressure the girl. Mary noticed this and placed her hands-on Lana’s neck, pulling her closer and kissing her back with a little passion and desperation. Lana gasped but kissed her back, giving all the love and passion she had.

Both women pulled away a few seconds later and smiled, chuckling and lookin into each other’s eyes.

 _“Not your first kiss, I suppose?”_ Lana teased biting her lip.

Mary blushed. _“Actually…yeah, it is.”_ She chuckled.

Lana softened by her words and smiled. _“Well…it was amazing. The best I’ve ever had. No joke or lie.”_

Mary laughed softly, she then stopped to look at Lana, smiling as she did so. _“Can uh…can we sleep now? Um…together? I’m getting tired but…I really don’t want to be away from you right now.”_

Lana smiled and stood up, extending her hand for Mary to take it. _“Come on then, my princess.”_

Mary chuckled and took her head, letting Lana lead her to the room. This is what she had read in fairytales…she couldn’t wait to make more story out of this.


End file.
